I am going to make a slight contradiction to an older blog post I wrote, called Motherhood, for your reference if you have not already read it. But I am ok with that because that’s life and that’s motherhood, well parenthood. Lots of peaks and valleys.
I am drinking wine on a week night, not my norm but a little insight into my last few days (weeks?). And to be honest, I totally get why people drink during the week, if you have kids, like, dah. Now, it goes without saying I love my kids, I love them with all my heart, they have given me a purpose I never knew I had, they are my everything, my world, my life.
But sometimes, just sometimes they can really make being a mum questionable. (Note: see my above devotion to my children!). I know as mothers we don’t want to take for granted the fact that we are able to have children in the first place. We brought them into this world, it’s our job to keep it together and take the positive parenting approach to raising them. But on the other hand I think it’s okay to complain because my god it can be so hard. You can read all the books in the world and hear all the stories but until you’re walking in those shoes, you will never now how f’ing hard it actually is.
Once the screams and the whines and the crying have started before I have my morning coffee that’s when I know it’s going to be “one of those days”. Try as I might, sometimes the mood cannot be changed from a 3-year-old who is learning about boundaries and what buttons to push (he knows every single one of them). His selective hearing (he definitely inherited from his father) is a real challenge most days. And his territorial ways and failure to share most toys with his sister drives both me and her nuts. My kids are at an age now where they fight. Both of them are frustrated at each other, want everything the other has and still learning to communicate effectively. Makes for some tough moments in our household.
Then there are the times you’re out and about…I have lost count at the amount of times I have left somewhere with two crying children under each arm, in a complete sweat and everyone staring. I just maintain eye site on the exit. I know people say they have these moments but I have never come across one outside of my own. It’s the worst feeling because you are pissed off at your own kids but then you also become mama bear because you are pissed off at the judging stares at your children. The irony.
Yes, we love our children, despite some of their extremely frustrating traits they have some of the most wonderful, magical best qualities we can only dream of having. But It’s also okay to say they are shits, driving us crazy, admit we want a break and look forward to bedtime.
If you are having those days then solidarity sista! We are in it together. I know there’s a stigma with mothers and mummy groups. I have DEFINITELY had close calls with a lot of unfriendly mothers. I’m not sure what it is or if it will ever change, but if you are having those tough days and wanna throw in the towel just turn on the baby sitter and put on a movie to keep the kids quite and have your 5th cup of coffee or open up a bottle of wine, and cheers. because you’re not alone.